Adventures in my Antec 300

So for the last 2 years i've been going around moaning like a whiney bitch because i need a new PC. Thats right, i've needed a new PC for 2 fuckin years!! People have had new PCs and upgraded them in that time. Thing is my computer isn't old, it's just crap. It can't even play Half Life 2 and it was built like 3 years AFTER that fuckin game was made. Jeez! Though of course this computer has been deeply important to me. This laptop has been here for me sharing all my experiences of the bizarre last 4 years, and it will always hold a special place in my heart, and it is because of this laptop that you've been getting these posts every whenever i do them. But this post isn't about silly 'Girl + Laptop 4 Eva' sentiments! This is about what happened after that time i was all "i need a new PC!" and james was all "build one!" and i was all "shit!" and then stuff was happening.

So i spent a few weeks doing my research and a spreadsheet was born. The first and most painful decision was the case. I wanted a case that had a window, a nice looking front and was something fairly original. After driving myself crazy trying to pick one i eventually chose the Antec 300, which is absolutely none of those things. I'll explain why later.

Yesterday was the day The Motherboard and the cpu were supposed to arrive, so yesterday was one of those days where i couldn't shower, cook, go outside, listen to music loudly or do anything in case they came and i missed them. That was how much i wanted them to come. BASTARDS. They didn't come! I didn't know what to do with myself. In the end the only way i could relieve the pain was to mock film trailers and cut up old graphic design books and cover my wall with trippy pictures. It was alright i guess.

I let them off cuz it was Easter and today they came. The delivery man called me Love but it didn't really make up for it. My enthusiasm was long gone, drowned in the misery of yesterday. Then i opened the package and pulled out the motherboard box and i stopped giving a fuck about being a mopey cow.

I was all well excited. Why was i excited? Look at the packaging! It screams "Bitch! THREE!! be EXCITED!!!!" and who argues with three, right??

Fucking THREE! though i'm still not sure about the relevance of most of the 3s on there.

Eventually i calmed down about all the 3's after all of about 2 seconds, and was ready to go ahead with the next stage: opening the box and looking at it!



I'm gonna be honest, it took about an hour- and a half can of relentless- to build up the courage to get it out of the anti static bag. I wasn't just staring at it that whole time mind, i was reading the manual too. Anyway it finally happened.


Naturally this is the very moment when Pippin starts yeowling at the door begging to be let in so she can express her desperate need to rub her staticy furs all over it. True that she was at the door all day anyway, which made trips to the toilet a bit like some stupid game from when you were 5. Anyway, i won, and that's all you need to know.

The little magic box of tricks:


Naturally the CPU, the most precious, important and expensive part of the computer is packaged in a pathetically thin fold of generic plastic and shoved at the bottom of a thin cardboard box. All i can say is i'm grateful that when i opened such reinforced, waterproof, anti-static foolproof packaging, the cpu dropped out onto a soft bed and slipped between the folds of my duvet so no one had the chance to accidentally stand on it or kick it across the floor.

Again, it took guts but i finally got the cpu strapped in, the humongous cpu cooler over the top of it and all seemed well. I hadn't even fucked up and touched the contacts or anything, i think. Everything was swell.



Human vs the I/O Panel:

Still doesn't fit right.. fucker.

..and that's when the I/O panel perked up and was like "Whats that? Going 'swell' huh? Ahem, then i believe that is my cue!" and so things started going shit. Thing is the I/O panel has these pokey things that are intended to help you line up the motherboard. I understand that's their intention, but they actually made life a lot more bloody difficult because no matter how i bent them, they were all somehow still in the way. In the end i figured screw you panel and just forced the board into position, but when i let go, the pokey bits pushed the board back and it scraped on the brass standoffs on the back. When i checked the back there were a few scrapes. Or maybe they were more scratches. Probably somewhere between scratches and scrapes. Scrapetches? I was going to take a picture to get a second opinion, but holding the mobo and the camera is kinda awkward. Anyhoo i'm not sure how serious it was, i guess we'll have to see. I mean all over the board (and the box) it does say ULTRA DURABLE and allegedly the 'UD' in 'X58A-UD3R' stands for 'Ultrafuckin-Durable' so hopefully that means it can handle a little scrapetch on the back. Hopefully..

Inside the computer, as modelled by blue hattifattiner

Ok so question time! Now I'm not saying you guys don't know how to ask questions, and you are of course welcome to, but i'm gonna let my subconscious save you the trouble. It's my subconscious so it kinda gets dibs. You know how it is.

What. That is not a full computer
I know, still to go: DVD drive, Graphics card, RAM, Hard drive, another fan, a monitor, essentially all the shit thats not whats mentioned above. I've got a spreadsheet with the models and prices so it's all planned out.

Careful you don't drop any screws into that PSU.
Despite noting this danger and deciding to only touch screws when it's laid flat on its side, it still happened. Don't worry, i got it out again, eventually..


What about that case? are you gonna mod that case? i bet you're SO gonna mod that case!
Damnit, why do i hang out with people that know me so well!? anyway, You're RIGHT. Turns out my dad is happy to let me use the equipment to put a window in it, and i spied some UV cathode tubes on amazon.. and the fans have blue LEDs, so you can see where this is all going. If i find some white paint i can use, i think you see the plan. This is why i got the Antec 300: it's good for modding.

Whats happening to the old laptop?
If the PC works out and is still running ok after a while, I'll relieve this laptop of all the horrible software it's gathered over the years that's been dragging it down and let it be reborn again anew with Linux.

With What?
Linux.

Oh right, i've never tried that.
Yeh. We're the same person, remember?

I'm never sure. Do you think this PC is gonna work?
I have no idea! I'm saying that right now. I'm sure building a PC is not so hard since people are doing it all the time; however i don't have complete faith in myself not to fuck something up. Also, i am kinda bothered about things like the scratch. And what if i did touch something i shouldn't've, y'know? i'm probably being paranoid because it's my first time, and you know how you beat yourself up more if you go wrong first time. I guess tune in next week (actually lets be safe and say two weeks) to find out if i'm cutting myself with despair or if i've gone clinically insane with happiness!

The Next week or so? Such optimism.
Yes!

What mouse you gonna use?
Gonna get a cheap mouse from tesco's

Serious?
No. The Wacom Tablet stays on.

Cool. Well, er.. that's all i have to say.
Good, it creeps me out when we talk.

Well guys, thats it for now. Obviously this is all still under construction so i may bore you with it some more in the near future. In the meantime, i will try to contain my excitement. I mean fuck.. I might be able to play HALF LIFE TWO!!!